Cinco De Mayo makes me soft...?

Twelve more days until I ship out ladies and gents.  These past couple of days have been nothing short of eventful to say the least.  How is it that I feel like I'm learning something completely new about myself every day?... Is there really that much more to learn?... okay, I know the answer to that.  

Well, I'm sitting here ready to rant and rave about my bruised heart as a product of my own stupidity... and how I'm ready to get out of this state to have the experience of a lifetime... and how even though I'm learning all these crazy new things, I still manage to make the worst decisions possible only to deviate from my previous self... but I'm not going to talk about any of that.  Because I've re-realized that amidst all the shit I put myself through to grow, and experience, and become who I'm not but dream of being... I am blessed.  Not in the "Jesus Christ" sense of being blessed (I'm still working on that..), but just taking a step back to realize what I do have because of the risks I've taken that have panned out in my favor.  They exist.  

... So, let me introduce you to some of my loves... some of the little things that make me smile daily... the things and people that make the disasters seem mindless...

*This is my mother.. the single, most important person in my life.  No one will ever replace the love in my heart that will forever belong to this incredibly strong and beautiful woman.  I wouldn't dream of living one day in this world without her.  She is, most simply and complexly put, my ma. 

*He is the reason I will never stop believing.  He is my guardian angel.  He speaks to me through the rain... and he will be waiting at heavens gates with lightning rods for all the jerks who ever hurt my heart  :)

*Colorado.  The place that will wait for me to stop traveling the world.  The place I will undoubtedly call home one day.

*The ocean.. my other love, only second to the Rockies.  The place the feeds my curiosity more than anything else.

*My sisters.  Enough said.

*Jen baby.  The one person that sucks at figuring out this life stuff just as much as I do.  The person who jumped on a plane to come hug me (this really happened).  The idiot who bought a $40 pool net to try and fish my digital camera out of the water hole on Market Street.  The person who loves me exactly the way I am, 80's get up and all. :)

*I had to. :) 

... it turns out this blog could go on longer than I thought, so I'm going to stop there.  I have so many people and things in my life that I can 100% stick the word love behind.  I ran across a quote I've been reading over all night... "Worry does not take the pain out of tomorrow, it merely takes the joy out of today."...

... Growing is painful, but oh so beautiful with a life full of love. :)